Marriage Help Articles

Title: Is Getting Turned On Sin?    Author: Unknown   This Writing Is Rated G

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In this article getting turned on means hearing or seeing or reading anything that might appeal to your sexual senses. Think of food. Think of Quiznos subs. They have some of the best pictures of their food that I've seen so far. You can look at the picturesyou're your salivary glands begin to flow. Now imagine yourself in your local Quiznos and you can see the pictures of the subs and you can see the actual subs on the platters and you can smell the delicious ingredients as they cook them.

Now just like we can work up our appetites and enjoy the smell and visually appealing pictures and looks of food, so also, some people can look at sexy pictures of the opposite sex or look at a couple making out in a movie, and they can begin to become sexually excited. That is what I mean by getting turned on.

Now, is someone committing the sin of lust when they get turned on by looking at a picture of the opposite sex or watch a video of a couple having sex?

My short answer is, Not any more than it is the sin of gluttony (coveting food) when someone enjoys the smell of food and their salivary glands begin to flow.

If the person smelling food begins to covet someone else's food and begins to not be content with the food they have then they begin to sin. And if the person who sees the nudity begins to covet to have the person in the picture or video and they then become discontent with their own spouse, then, yes they are coveting.

But it is not getting turned on that is a sin. Just as it is not enjoying smelling the food that is a sin. Coveting something that is not yours, is the sin in both cases. Coveting to have sex with another person is called lust and coveting food that is not yours is called gluttony.

So often I hear the argument that a married couple should not read an erotic story or watch an erotic movie because, as one person put it What is to prevent lust toward one of the persons who looks particularly attractive or fun?

Many Christians think that becoming sexually aroused is lust. They think that if you see or read or hear something that is sexy or that looks sexy, that this is lusting. And they think that God condemns lust and so God also condemns becoming sexually aroused and God also condemns looking at anything that might make you get sexually aroused.

Sexual arousal is an emotion. God does not condemn people for having emotions. God condemns people for acts of the will. People cannot control when they become sexually aroused. That is why they try and use erotic materials in their marriage; to help them become aroused. And in the marriage bed, God wants the married couple to be sexually aroused.

The only verse in the Bible on lust is Matthew 5 verse 28. In Matthew 5 verses 27 to 28 Jesus said it was adultery to covet to have sex with a married woman. Any fair Bible scholar will admit that this should be the correct interpretation because it is clear that Jesus was talking about a married woman and adultery and about coveting. And so Jesus was not referring to sexual arousal, but rather Jesus was referring to someone who consciously in their mind, was earnestly wanting and coveting to have sex with another woman (married woman).

When a husband and wife watch an erotic video together, they are not earnestly coveting to have sex with the pictures in the video. That is simply not true. They want to have sex with each other and simply want to get help becoming aroused.

It just so happens that when humans watch a movie or read a story, they tend to take on, or experience the emotions in the story or video. So if the story has danger, they experience a rise in their emotion of fear. If the story has sexual activity, they experience an increase in sexual desire. This increase in sexual desire is what helps the married couple to become aroused and better enjoy sex with each other.

Getting turned on is not sin; it is an automatic response of our body to stimuli. In the marriage bedroom, this automatic stimuli can be helpful. Many times a husband and wife want to be sexually aroused for each other but they can't just turn it on. That is when erotic materials can help them.

Using erotic materials in the marriage is far safer than using drugs like Viagra. Even when taking Viagra the man needs something to trigger his erection. Erotic materials can help with this and can make the sexual encounter with his wife to be far more pleasurable.

Finding moral erotic materials is a problem in our society. Christians don't want to watch erotic videos that have homosexuality and cheating and premarital sex in them.

Pray that God will soften the hearts of Christians, that they will see the usefulness of promoting moral erotic materials to help marriages. Once Christians get off their self-righteous high horse of condemning erotic materials and begin to see how moral erotic materials can help marriages, then Christian divorce rates will drop drastically and will never again be higher than those of non-Christians as is the case today.