Christian Life Articles

Title: Is it OK to watch otherwise moral videos without knowing the marital status of the actors?    Author: Unknown   This Writing Is Rated G


There is quite a bit of discussion throughout this website about the use of moral erotic materials by married couples to spice things up. The consensus seems to be that since it is not forbidden that it is OK before God. My husband and I have this conviction as well, and do use pictures and videos that include nudity and sexual activity. My question though is this Does the marital status of the actors in their real lives matter?

We intentionally avoid videos that glorify adultery. If the plot includes an adulterous relationship, it is nearly always shown in a way that glorifies the illicitness of the relationship. This we can't participate in with a clear conscious before God. It is not the sex itself that is wrong for us; it is the context in which it is presented. I think it is true that sex like most other things is neither good nor bad, but how it is used can be either. It is what is in the heart of the people that is of concern to God and a movie that glorifies sin and prompts us to enjoy an act of sin is not something we can participate in. However, what about the actors marital status in real life?

If two actors are having real sex to make a movie or educational video about sexuality, surely their marital and spiritual relationships in their real lives matter to them (or should) and their relationship to God (if any). But are we responsible for their actions before God? Assuming the movie content itself is good and moral are we sinning if we watch and enjoy without knowing for sure that they are married? Might they be sinning by making the movie, and if they are, are participating in that in some way. How can we know? What if they were married and their spouses gave permission to make the movie with someone else? What both we non-virgin singles? And are we even responsible for knowing any of that? Orare we just responsible for how we are using it and what is in OUR hearts? If so then we could conceivably be watching two other sin themselves and it be OK for us before God since we are not enjoying the sin we can't even be sure of, but rather the sex itself presented in a moral context?

Sorry for the many questions, but I would love input on this form the webmaster of this site or any other subscribers. This is an area that I feel unsure of where for right now at least my heart and head seem to be at odds. All thoughts and input would be very welcomed and helpful. Thanks.

Comment by: Old Site   Date: 2/9/2013 7:49:50 PM

A reader says ... i agree with the above person..God is not against you having fun and enjoy sex.he did make eve for adam.. and he told david after he sinned..that he would have given him more wifes if he wanted more..more wives equal more you know he had more then one at a time i've read that lesbian sex is never condemned in the OT and only condemned in the NT if they reject the natural use of the as long as there is a man involved. i think women using dildos or vibs on each other would be crossing the line since it useing something to replace the male member. what we need is to build loving and caring marriages where one spouse cares more about pleasing the other then themselves that way the one should give the other permission to enjoy themselves

A reader says ... Editor: Thanks for your questions. Sorry I had not answered your question in our discussion groups section. I'll try and answer your questions here.

Please note it's a bit late tonight so I'm going to try and answer this from memory and not look up each scripture reference to back up my thoughts.

My wife and I had similar concerns also as have other subscribers here. My wife and I agree that as Christians we should try and find story lines that are not cheating or homosexual etc, but rather reflect sexual situations condoned or at least allowed by God.

In my searching the scriptures in the past it seemed that watching videos of sex where you are not sure whether the partners were married is sort of like - in the New Testament - eating meat that you bought at the market place that had been offered to idols (it was cheaper than other meat). Paul indicated that the origin of the meat was not important and so Paul indicated that it was ok to eat meat offered to idols unless you were inviting your Christian brother over for dinner and you knew that he would be offended if he ate the meat offered to idols.

So the sinful origin of the meat offered to idols was not important but rather how the meat was used - as non-sinful nourishment - that is what was important.

In a similar way it should be ok to watch an erotic video even though the couple in the video is not married, because what is important, is how the video is used - to help a pure marriage relationship - that is what is important.

The other observation is that God never really condemns sex between consensual single adults in the Bible. In the Old Testament, only sex with a virgin and sex with a married woman were condemned. Sex with a prostitute was strongly discouraged but not outlawed. But men could have sex with unmarried woman and concubines and additional wives - there was no law against consensual adult hetrosexual sex.

In the New Testament Paul teaches we should not have sex with prostitutes and "Sexual Immorality" is condemned. But "Sexual Immoraality" is never defined and so we have to look back to the Old Testament for a definition. And in the Old Testament there is no law against sex between consenting non-married adults.

Well I pray you will have wisdom in your thinking. Like you said it is the purpose of why you are using the videos that I believe is important. Since you are using the videos to get sexually excited so you and your spouse can have better sex, I would sure think God would approve of it, if having better sex helps you both to be better servants for Christ.

At times it sure has helped my wife and I in our marriage. We thank the Lord for the great sex and I'm sure it has helped us be better servants for Christ.

One caution is that we all need to be very careful that watching erotic videos is not illegal where we live. And even reading or listening to stories on this web site might be illegal in some countries and/or states.

Also, I strongly discourage subscribers from accessing our web site while at work. I don't want anyone to get fired for visting our web site at work.